Family Culture

 Families are so important for learning and changing the future. This week in class we talked about culture. What is it? Is it the same for all the people in a region? How does it affect our lives now? In the future?

In my head, culture is the sum of all the things you do and all the things you value. That is going to be different for every family. So, your family culture is totally and completely unique to y’all. I think that’s really cool actually. I guess that can be good and bad depending on your family.

Sometimes we want to appreciate and continue the culture we were raised with and sometimes we don’t. It’s even more difficult to find what things you want to keep and what you don’t when you are married. I know I have the struggle a little in my life. So how do you merge two different cultures? How do you help each side of the family to have a part or do you and your spouse make your own?

I have thought a lot about this because my family is really different from my husband’s family. My husband and I talk a lot about the goals we have and how we want our family to be. Things we want to do as parents and things we don’t want to do as parents. We have learned what we like about parenting and what we don’t like about parenting from our parents. We can take those things and try and be the best parents we can. Of course, learning and changing along the way.

 A little subject change. (It relates, I promise!) We watched this video of a family that is not very well off. The mom has been working at Burger King for years and has goals to go to school to become a teacher. She walks to her job because she doesn’t have a car. I was sitting there thinking about why she wouldn’t just take the steps to go to school. There are programs set up to help families in her situation to have a better life. I don’t want to judge because I know life is hard and habits are hard to break. Maybe it’s also a pride issue where she didn’t want to be on welfare or get government assistance. Maybe it’s not as easy as it seems to me to go to school. I absolutely want to be kind in this situation, but it goes on to affect her kids and then her grandkids. Her kids end up in the same situation as her, not really working or having a good life. She has one son that was adamant that he would have a better life and go to college. He ended up getting a girl pregnant and dropping out of high school with six months to go. Why do these things seem to happen more in families with lower incomes? What is the cause? I know people can change their lives. I know people can break habits and cycles. My parents were teen parents, and they worked hard to go to school and provide us all with a good life. I am absolutely blessed to have the life I have. I have never not had something I needed. I got most the things I wanted because my parents could afford it or I saved enough of my own money. I lot of people can’t say that and it makes me really grateful for the life my parents have given me. My parents were honest and open about their mistakes so none of their kids would become teen parents as well. My mom always told me that her and my dad are the exception, not the rule. Most teen parents don’t stay together, but my parents made it work. So maybe it takes the parents really wanting a different life for themselves and for their kids. Maybe the kids have to see the parents take those steps to make changes, so they can see the rewards from that.

So how does that relate to culture? Well, I think the example we grow up with is typically what we follow. Children learn a lot of just watching and trying. If kids see their parents doing something, they will probably do it or at least try it. And those things will affect their future.